Delight in this Moment

Aliyah has taught me some really valuable lessons about being a better person and a better parent but there is one thing that stands out above all the rest. The lesson... Don’t rush it.

Don’t be in a hurry for your baby to sleep through the night or to start solids or to sit up or crawl or walk. If I can offer you one bit of advice, it’s to just enjoy the stage your baby is in right.this.moment.

It’s human nature to look towards the future - to imagine all the fun that comes with the next milestone in your child’s life… but looking back on the nearly 28 months since my oldest daughter was born, I am shocked at how fast my tiny baby has been replaced with a little girl. I sometimes go and study pictures of her when she was infant. I look at those deep thigh rolls that are all but gone now - at her small limbs that are now stretching up and out and I can’t believe how quickly her infancy passed.

Of course It’s important to stimulate and encourage your child - but I feel like I was far too focused on trying to ensure that she was advanced. I found myself (despite knowing better!) comparing her to her peers and worrying unnecessarily when a friend’s baby crawled before she did or reveling in the fact that she was one of the first among her peers to use a cup without a lid. I’d rattle off a list of her accomplishments at every pediatrician appointment so that our doctor would tell me how impressive her development was. In so many ways I felt as if her advanced development was a reflection of my success as her mother.

I look at Aliyah's first year now that I have Everly, and wonder - Did I take enough time to just enjoy the fact that one day soon she wouldn’t sleep with her knees curled beneath her on my chest, sit content and happy in a bouncy seat or chew on her chubby toes for entertainment? Any of you who read this blog and have a child Aliyah's age or older can agree that they all roll over, they all sit up, they all crawl, and cruise, and walk and run eventually. All of them - each will do it on their own schedule - but they all get there.

Armed with this revelation, I am taking my sweet time this go round. Instead of focusing on whether Everly is advancing at a the same rate (or faster or slower) than her peers - I am letting her lead the way. Even as I watch more and push less, she is still moving forward and growing at what feels like the speed of light as skinny newborn legs turn to roly poly baby legs. I am savoring each stage more as I know that it will be gone and replaced with a new one far too soon.

The same now goes for Aliyah - no more over eagerness to move her into her next stage of development. We are filling her life with love, creativity, and adventure while letting her decide how it will manifest into new abilities within her.

I have allowed myself time to just sit with my babies without feeling guilty that the laundry hasn't yet been done, or that we have destroyed the living room from playing all afternoon together. I watch in awe as Aliyah's imagination takes off and Everly sleeps so soundly on my chest. And it is such a beautiful view...

So that’s it. My two cents. Slow down. Let go a little. Delight in this moment, dear mothers. The tiny newborn. The squishy infant. The crawling, the cruising, the walking… it will all come and go faster than your heart can possibly imagine.

And with that, be happy. keep your heart full. know that you are blessed. Even though it does go fast - live in every moment so there is no need to look back and wish for do-overs.

Delight in THIS moment where ever you are.